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Wednesday, September 28, 2011

INSECURED - in a relationship

Hello peeps. Assalamualaikum. Kembali menulis pada jam 1:59AM. I still can’t sleep at this moment. Wanna ask you guys,have you ever get caught in a relationship? I bet most of u have. Getting in a relationship is not as easy as we tought actually. For those who really serious and comitted to be in a relationship,a lot of things had to be sacrificed. Look at your surroundings,at facebook normally,most of your friends or even your juniors who just 13 years old have been caught in a relationship. A relationship that we labelled as ‘puppy love’ or 'monkey love'.

Love at school time mostly are labelled as puppy love. Coz it only lasts for a while. Sometimes it takes only a week. Or years. Depends on the person itself. For me,puppy love is just like an entertainment. Utk mengisi masa lapang maybe. Atau utk suka-suka bajet hot perasan comel sbb ada boyfie. What the fish lah kan. But old time remains as memories. Now,we are getting older and wiser and maybe,more matured (I guess).LOVE can be defined in subjective meanings. Ada banyak maksud. Depends to the person who experienced it. For those who always failed in love,maybe they will said that LOVE is nothing. LOVE is just a stupid thing. But for those who feel really happy with his/her partner,maybe for them LOVE is everything,the SWEETEST thing ever happened in their life. Depends.

Bagi aku,LOVE is a gift. A mystery sometimes. Bagi aku cinta adalah satu pengorbanan. Somebody who are willing to love must willing to sacrifice. It is not easy actually. Berkorban hati dan perasaan. Rela disakiti dan rela menyakiti. Willing to cry at night knowing that your boyfie lie to you,or willing to spend your money to  the person you loved. Or willing to spend most of your time texting,chatting with our boyfren/girlfen. Normally a normal coupled will have an INSECURED feelings. Coz they were just coupled,not married yet. So they will afraid of soooooooo many things. (I put some extras O coz I wanna make it sounds MANY LOL). For example,when our boyfie did not text us at the time he usually text,we will quickly assumed that he text others or he hang out with other girl or ETC. When we called him but the line engaged,OMG feels like wanna cry coz we assumed that he was on call with other girl. ASSUMED. That what a GIRL normally did. Am I right?

I did that. I write this coz I did that. I am a girl who always feel INSECURED. I have NEGATIVE THINKINGS which is sooo not right. We shouldn’t had it actually. A happy person is the one who always have positive thinking in their minds. They will never ASSUMED bad things about others. They will never judge someone randomly. And I wish I am one of them. Seriously. I’m tired of feeling INSECURE all the time. I’m tired of asking the same question to my boy.  “apasal lambat reply,msg ngan org lain?” “apasal on9 fb,nak chat ngan org lain?” “asal dr td xmesej?dh jemu nak mesej awek sendiri?” huh. I bet my boy will feel like “amende la dia ni tanye xde usul periksa” “adoi balik2 soalan yg same”.  Ahh you. Don’t u know that I always feel insecured? Don’t u know that ur girl here always have negative thinking towards you?

I’m sorry for who I am. I’m sorry I am being so unmatured in handlings problems and handlings YOU. I wish I could be like u who always calm in solving problems. I wish I could be like a man who never ‘cepat melatah’. Who always thinks wiser than woman. Who thinks before speak. But that what LOVE is actually. Which have pro and contra. You and me are two different creatures although we are in the same homo-sapiens spesies. LOL. Pro versus contra. LOVE is about understanding each others. Is about two different peoples who shares the same heart. Ahh sooo hyperbolic but nevermind,just overcome all the obstacle,be yourself not others and the most important things is,throw all the negative thinkings and say HELLO to positive thinkings. Try to bear in mind that if HE is yours,he will be yours no matter how hard the universe challenges you,but if he is not yours,whatever u did,no matter how hard u try,he will NEVER be yours. Chill out and make some changes. *pesan utk diri sendiri.  =)

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